This Thanksgiving, I am especially grateful that the handful of people who read what I write aren’t overly critical, nor do they tell me how ill-informed I am. None of us has a guidebook in this life and we are all humble creatures trying to make sense of everything we are exposed to. I am thankful for my anonimity, the freedom I have to express my opinions and little ideas, and the space I have to be mistaken and learn from those mistakes.

Paying for stolen goods

I just saw a homeless man pick flowers in the median, flowers planted by the city. He is going to sell them.

I bought a bouquet like that from a homeless person once, for a dollar. Now I know where they came from. If I had seen him pick them, I wouldn’t have bought them.

I guessed Obama would win the election. Someone bet me he wouldn’t. That was a bet I couldn’t lose so I took it. At the end, I gave him a chance to back out. No? Okay, then vote for Obama and you can keep your money. No? Now I have dirty money. And Obama got one less vote.

And then I realized about everything we buy is stolen. The game is to lay claim to everything of "value." Then you can sell it. We even sell ideas. We even sell music. Things that are part of the collective unconscious.

Do you really think your wealth is all product of your hard work or talent? Fifty percent at best. The rest is luck. Or to the businessman, opportunity.

I guess we buy and sell because we can’t share nicely. Until we learn to all share, some have to steal while the rest of us buy their stolen property.


Lesson Learned Today: Self-depricating generosity never goes unpunished.

Don’t give more than you can afford to unless you are obeying a direct order from God.

On hold

Bank of America must not be doing too well these days. My estimated wait time is 125 minutes. It has been 63 minutes so far. I may go crazy listening to their theme song another hour.

du-duduuu-dudu, du-duduuu-dudu, du-duduuu-dudu-duuuuuuuu….

Regarding the Haves and the Have Nots

Have Not
Want Not

The things you own so easily own you.
Want Not,
And if you’re really serious
Have Not.

Living for others is an easy way to know God.
How can you serve others when you are collecting from them?
How can you minister to others when you are climbing over their backs?
To pass through the eye of that needle
Into the expansive life of bliss and freedom
One must be naked and humble

In the end
You can’t take it with you
Love God or love money.
You cannot serve two masters.

Have Not
Want Not

Not Nice Anymore

I’ve gone through some interesting transformations since middle school. My ‘best friend’ from high school, upon seeing me again ten years later, observed I wasn’t as "nice" as I used to be.

I think this is true, and I’ve been trying to determine why. In high school, I was a very nice, kind person, but I also had very rigid boundaries and positions. I was kind on the outside, but inside I was more distant from those I interacted with. I’ve observed that some Christians raised like I was make the mistake of feeling very confident in their status of being ‘saved’, and relate to others in a distanced way, from the deep-seeded position of being on a morally superior high-road.

As I’ve become more humble about my standing in the universe, I’ve become less careful about being a moral example by which others could come to God. I think falling from my high horse has bruised me up a little bit.

I’m not as patient as I used to be, and I don’t know why. While I’m far more tolerant and understanding of people’s actions in general, I’m sometimes less patient with people on a one-on-one basis. Perhaps living in a city has contributed to this. In the city you are not recognized or rewarded for kindness; in fact, it usually slows down any given exchange, so it is generally not practiced or encouraged.

Perhaps I’ve grown more into my Aries and Leo influences in the city; signs which favor quick decisions and pride. Perhaps in my humility I have hesitated to open my heart to others as freely, unsure of what I would say when they appreciate me, no longer quick to convert.

I’m not sure how to move forward, but I’m sure the path is being illuminated as I write this.

The Next Conversation

No matter what your viewpoint, Proposition 8 in California has sparked some great discussion about sexuality, evolution, civil rights, education, race and religion. Here are a few of the things I’ve been hearing that I find particularly relevant or interesting:

*Condoning gay marriage is condoning the extinction of humans
–this is particularly fun hearing from people that believe in the rapture and don’t believe in evolution
–Lesbians still make babies all the time. Modern technology makes this very easy.

*Homosexuality is more taboo in the black community
–why is this? Assuming common knowledge is correct that black men are well-hung (scientific studies, anyone?) and physically superior in many athletic endeavors. So it is not surprising that a culture of great breeding potential would take offense to its own members deciding to put the key in the wrong hole, so to speak. Do you have a better explanation?

*Polygamy and homosexuality are both taboo. –Random Fact: Polygamy limits poor people’s reproductive/marriage chances as richer men can support more wives.
–We already have a form of polygamy as an institute in this country: It’s called divorce and child support. It allows a man to have multiple children by multiple wives. And that doesn’t bother me any. It would be better if it was just pure polygamy though, then the children wouldn’t be separated from their parents as much. I realize this is pretty radical for most people to swallow.

I think gay people want and deserve acknowledgement that they aren’t going away regardless of how people vote. Yes, they are a minority, always have been and probably always will be. I do believe some people are gay by circumstance & choice (there is plenty of evidence for distortion of attraction due to sexual abuse or other forms of abuse, or even manipulation by the parents around the age of gender identity formation, where parents choose to blur or cross gender lines when relating to their child ). In the sense of abuse or manipulation, you could actually see homosexuality as a survival mechanism for certain people, who have learned that the opposite sex is not to be trusted or interacted with, or that they are rewarded with life-sustaining love for acting more masculine or feminine. As for the other percentage of homosexuals (I’m going to guess it is around 60 percent of gays which are truly genetically predispositioned NOT to be attracted to members of the same sex), you have to be naive or ignorant to look past these people’s natural instincts. Everyone has a cousin, aunt, or uncle that CLEARLY does not fit the heterosexual norm. Admittedly, some gays are less easy to spot.

The Purpose of Life

28 years into my journey, I think I have finally figured out the purpose of life. Are you ready?

The purpose of life is to live.

There are 2 ways to live your life: Happily or unhappily. All the healing & spiritual traditions exist to give us hints on how to be happy.

Why be happy? Because happy people live longer and/or help others live long enough to reproduce or care for others.

Which brings me back to my original point that the purpose of life is life.

There seems to be no benefit in a joyful person seeking God. Only when a burden is laid upon a heart does a person feel the need to be uplifted.

So we must maintain a sense of humor about life. In 10,000 years no one has found a greater purpose in life than total selfless dedication to others’ happiness and well-being.

Some sages have disappeared into mountains and some have come down with ideas about peace, some with ideas about healing, some just stayed up there to purge their own demons completely and pray for the world.

I don’t believe anyone understands where we are at in the cycle of creation, much less what set the cycle in motion. At least I have not yet heard any complete, viable explanations.

I don’t believe my purpose in life is to choose between a winning or losing team to save my soul from infinite torture.
I don’t believe my purpose in life is to pay for all the mistakes of my past life and earn a bigger, better virtual reality character for my soul to inhabit on future journeys.

I think the best guideline for being a person is to pursue happiness and not infringe on other’s pursuits of happiness.

This is where leaders like Hitler and others got it wrong…They took a Machiavellian approach to just furthering life as they thought life should be furthered without promoting happiness. It is like the losing designer on Project Runway who is told their design lacks ‘Joy.’