You open me up
Like a flower
I become so sweet and moist
Playful and exuberant
Colorful and exposed
No man can resist
How does one man
Make me love the whole world?
How do you send me so far out
After bringing me so far in?
My heart dances after being with you
And everyone wants to dance along

"Your love is like a chunk of gold
Hard to gain and hard to hold"

Caught my first wave today, woohoo!

Learned:
1) My 2nd toe on my left foot inexplicably goes numb, still works, just loses all circulation – weird.
2) The body gets used to being unstable on the board when paddling/swimming. The mind needs to stop freaking out.
3)Being a wave slut is more fun, and tiring, than being selective.
4)It's ok not to pop up without your hands at first! Keep arms back farther.
5)Swimming on a board is way different than swimming with legs.
6)Timing just as important as balance. Can't get in the wave, can't get up.
7)Yeah, don't hold the board in front of you, like they warn you not to. Chinwhack.
8)Yogic saltwater flushes for the nasal cavities are not necessary, just take a few spills underwater.
9)Sea lions are cooler up close in the water. They really check you out.
10)I need a longer board. 8'2" not quite enough for me. But my 4:3 wetsuit was perfectly warm, although the loose threading gave me a lovely neck rash.

Neurologic disorders such as Parkinson's and Fibromyalgia may have roots in mercury toxicity. If you eat a lot of fish, sushi, or have silver mercury fillings, you may be in danger of poisoning yourself. Get tested for mercury poisoning.

Read: The UltraMind Solution by Dr. Mark Hyman

I caught parts of an interesting show called the Science of Sex Appeal. I thought of some other areas where the same chemicals involved in love/attraction may be playing hidden roles in other relationships:


Celebrity Freakouts
I am curious to know whether dopamine is the cause of celebrity freakouts in young women. A relationship with a celebrity is one-sided. A person can build up a whole “history” or “relationship” with another person simply by hearing or reading about them. Those positive memories of a celebrity could activate elevated dopamine production via the Caudate Nucleus. Once the girl, who is already in “love” (maintains high dopamine levels by thinking of the celebrity constantly) meets the celebrity or thinks she is about to meet the celebrity in person, dopamine levels spike, causing an overreaction that appears drug-induced (because it is).

Coaching Relationships
According to both the Maslow and ERG Theory hierarchy of needs, esteem and relatedness are very important to a person. The need to feel appreciated, like at a job, is consistently ranked very high next to other even more basic needs. People need to feel connected. Dopamine connects people chemically. It makes you want to repeat an experience that feels rewarding. Forming positive experiences with other people causes them to produce dopamine when they think of you. Dopamine leads to cravings. Cravings pull from the heart, energetically speaking.

You’ve heard the expression: “My heart just isn’t into it anymore.” Likely what happened is that the reward circuit has stopped. Unpleasant memories have crowded out the pleasant ones. Dopamine production goes down, cravings for the person/activity dwindle.

more thoughts later…

I'm feeling quite unsettled tonight. I am putting on a big massage event, and keeping recycling in my head about what I'm doing with my life. Every 3-4 years I get a big itch to move on, and it is suddenly hitting me again. This is the time of year I quit working at Chevron 4 years ago.

My exit strategy is not clear. I'd like to coach the season out, and possibly do another. I'm still feeling out how much time I can commit to my massage therapy business. I really need people running it who have more time to promote it than I do. There is so much team stuff and social networking stuff that can be done with it that I simply do not have time or energy to organize. I would love to have a successor that I could advise, someone who is super-passionate about what they are providing to the community and can promote it full-time.

It's time for some deep thinking, maybe this weekend. I'm also recycling my dating ideas currently. Love, love, love the guy I've been seeing, but feeling like I want to consume him more than he wants to be consumed, so I'm branching out in the love department. Probably should get my work shi# together first, but feeling like maybe a relationship could help me plot my next course of action. It's getting close to "family" time for me, biologically. Maybe it's not so bad if I start winding things down a bit on the work front and just work on being more fiscally responsible…Lord knows it's about time.

To changes

Ain't no sunshine when he's gone.
It's not warm when he's away.
Ain't no sunshine when he's gone
And he's always gone too long anytime he goes away.

Wonder this time where he's gone,
Wonder if he's gone to stay
Ain't no sunshine when he's gone
And this house just ain't no home anytime he goes away.

And I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know

Hey, I ought to leave the young thing alone,
But ain't no sunshine when he's gone, only darkness everyday.
Ain't no sunshine when he's gone,
And this house just ain't no home anytime he goes away.

Anytime he goes away.
Anytime he goes away.
Anytime he goes away.
Anytime he goes away.

You know you're in hot water when two weeks feels like two lifetimes.

My business and coaching to-do lists have been expanding for some time. Time for a personal to-do!

-redesign clothes storage
-hang colorful artwork
-move furniture
-colorful bedsheets/duvet

-sign up for surf lesson
-find chinese language cd & commit 30mins daily
-schedule weekly to-do checkup time
-buy lingerie (ooo-la-la)
-schedule laundry
-sew laptop chargers onto cases
-organize makeup
-give away uncomfortable shoes
-put unused items into storage
-organize books for at-home or on-the-go
-lunch-making station
-defrost fridge
-spare change container
-find mini sunscreens

My roommate Uvonne dedicated this song to me today. I DO have so much love to give!!


Don’t do that 
Baby, please don’t do that 
What are you cryin’ for 
Is it because you’re sad or mad or 
Nothing’s gonna go wrong 
Sometimes we feel inside of us that 
That everything we have is only here for today 
But every now and then two people get lucky 
And find that certain thing that make them wanna 
Just keep it, just keep it that way 
I don’t want you to feel that 
That you have to go through these changes when 
Knowin’ no way 
I know that our love is different 
Our lives will be different 
Trust me, baby, trust me 

Now that I’m here no more tears 
Come here, come here 
And you won’t find things that broke your heart 
And blew your mind 
Not here, no, not here 

And my, oh, my 
Girl, can’t you see, can’t you see that I 
I’ve got so much to give to you, my dear 
It’s gonna take a lifetime, it’s gonna take years 

To you my dear I’ve got so much to give 
It’s gonna take my lifetime 
It’s gonna take years and years and years and years 

And I’ll fill you in your hopes and dreams 
Believe me, girl, you got everything 
Right here, right here 
No one could offer you more 
Than the love I have for you in store 
It’s here, oh, oh, yeah 

And my, oh, my 
Honey, can’t you see, can’t you see that I 
I got so much to give to you my dear 
It’s gonna take a lifetime, it’s gonna take years 

To you my dear I’ve got so much to give 
It’s gonna take my lifetime 
It’s gonna take years and years and years and years 

Believe me, baby 
We found that certain thing 
That certain feeling 
That lets two people express themselves how they feel 
Let your love flow inside of you 
Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, baby