I’m wondering if I’ve lost so much testosterone that I don’t feel like acheiving anything athletically anymore? Between the not working out like the beast I used to be, and the now 2 ferilization treatments I’ve gone through to be an egg donor, and the meat-free diet I’ve maintined for 2 years…I don’t know.

I have no athletic ambition currently. I suppose if I were to hit the weights hard again, my ambition might return. But it’s been so nice living pain-free for the past 5 years! What to do, what to do…I’m staying "in-shape" walking around this hilly city everyday, but is it enough?

I feel like I’m at a place mentally where I could finally accomplish some things competitively if I wanted to. If I had the drive.

Ug.