Breaking it Down

Keeping a text message log I was able to go back 5 months and analyze a relationship. What I noticed was that I preferred to have constant communication. If I didn't hear back from my love within a couple of hours I would get a little anxious. One day and I was questioning all intentions. After 3-4 days I would get extremely despondent and irritated. After 5 days he ceased to exist in my world and I desperately sought to find other potential mates!

My guess is that I was trying to fit this relationship into the previous one's template. My ex and I would talk EVERY DAY on the phone, or at least send text messages.

Part of it may be biological too…after 3-4 days a woman is wired to go back for more love to increase her chances of furthering the species!

All the while, my mind was constantly computing his intentions & motivations based off the time lapse and content of the last communication (a computation which is very subjective so likely 80 percent false).

Interesting looking at this relationship from a "scientific" point of view tonight, sans emotion. A good perspective.

Lessons learned: ummmm, two people may bring two communication frequency histories to the relationship (not to mention communication preferences, i.e. Email vs. Text vs. Chat vs. Calling). Silence might actually be golden sometimes. I need communication (or better yet physical contact) at least twice a week to stave off flight tendencies in a non-committed relationship.