Reality Escapes Me

I want to walk
And breathe
And dance with my eyes closed
I want to love
And share
And experience this life through you

I want to escape
And forget
And live in the now
I want to pulse
And melt
And drip to the floor
I want to spread
And permeate
And be in your body
I want to smell you
Taste you
And steal your warmth.

And I want to fly
Into tomorrow
Where anything I want
Comes true
And live my perfect fantasy
Where you know me
And we speak with the same heart
And we forget
All the years we wasted

Lover, why do we pretend
We are strangers?
I've known you always
And yet you hurt me.
You steal my wishes and throw them out the window as you drive
Away, away.

And I am powerless
To chase you
Over that high wall
I can't even peek in.
And i sit with my back at the wall
Crying and feeling sorry for myself
And then i wander back to
My lonely world where i can create anything
But you.

And more time passes
And i miss you.
And you don't know
Because you can't see over that wall
Besides, you're driving away.
And the farther you get
The less real i am.
Until i don't exist at all.

And i build my castles
And entertain everyone
With my real stories
That sound like dreams.
And you get close enough
And throw a nickel over the wall.
I pick it up
And rub it without looking
Then throw it over the cliff's edge
And listen to it bounce
Down, down.

Then i turn around
And charge toward the wall
And pound and pound
With my two fists
Until they are bloody
And scream until
I have no voice.

Then i wonder what would happen if i
just wandered away from the wall
And never came back
And the ivy would cover it
And muffle your screams
And i could roll down the hill
Into an open green meadow
Where the sun
Warms my skin
And the winds
Caress my body
And I dance and sprawl
And shout in ecstasy
That reality has not escaped me.